Is Your Child Being Sexually Abused/Molested

 

Q: After reading about sexual abuse of priests towards children, I have concerns about if my own child has been abused. He attends a Christian preschool, and I trust everyone there. What are some symptoms a child may show if he or she has been sexually abused?

A: Child molesters often find employment in positions where they can have contact with children. Since this topic has been in the media so much recently, it is natural to wonder if your child is being abused by someone you trust to teach or care for him. Here are some clues to possible victimization.

Abused children are often

• fearful of interpersonal relationships or overly compliant
• withdrawn or aggressive, hyperactive
• constantly irritable or listless, detached
• affectionless or overly affectionate (misconstrued as seductive)

Physical symptoms

• bruises, burns, scars, welts, broken bones, continuing or unexplained injuries
• urinary infections (particularly in young children)
• sexually transmitted disease
• chronic ailments, stomach aches, vomiting, eating disorders
• vaginal or anal soreness, bleeding or itching

Activity and habit clues

• nightmares
• inappropriate masturbation
• child is afraid to go home or to some other location
• running away
• delinquency
• fear of being with a particular person
• lying
• prostitution

Age inappropriate behavior

• onset of thumb sucking
• sexually active or aware
• promiscuity
• bed wetting
• alcohol/substance abuse
• older child assaulting younger children
• child takes on adult responsibilities

Educational concerns

• extreme curiosity, imagination
• academic failure
• sleeping in class
• inability to concentrate

Emotional indicators

• depression
• phobias, fear of darkness, public restrooms
• chronic ailments
• self-inflicted injuries
• injuring/killing animals
• excessively fearful
• lack of spontaneity, creativity

In general, when you see a change in behavior in your child, it is a signal that something is wrong. If you suspect your child is being victimized, please contact a professional counselor, psychologist or social worker who is mature and has experience working with children who are the age of your child. Counselors should have a license to practice, and also have defined areas of expertise. Be sure to check fees for services, and whether or not your insurance pays for the service. And if after a couple of sessions you find your child is not comfortable with the counselor, ask for a referral to someone else.

Thanks for your question, and please let me know if I can be of further assistance to you.

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