Realistic New Year's Resolutions

Q: It's the first Sunday of the New Year, and already I have broken my "resolutions". I still am eating all the candy and unhealthy foods that I vowed to stop eating, and I have even gained weight since January 1. Now I am making excuses for not taking the exercise class I promised myself. I am never going to make New Year's resolutions, because they only add to my feelings of failure.

A: Resolutions can be made unwisely or unrealistically, which sets you up for failure. It might be better to re-examine, and re-fashion them so you are more likely to see them through. You can re-think your goals, anytime! And you might want to do this frequently. Here are some ideas:

• Have you made too many resolutions? The start of a new year may have inspired you to plan to do too much, which is sure to set you up for failure. Make only two or three resolutions, and for every one that takes something away, such as quit eating chocolate, or spending less money, give yourself a positive, such as taking an exercise class, or learning a new language.
• Prioritize. Select the most important resolution and start working on it. You can delay the others until later, until you are sticking with number one.
• Seek information. Do you have the information you need to put the resolution into practice? For example, to start an exercise program you need to know the names and locations of gyms in your area, plus prices, and amenities, etc.
• Write it down. Make a contract with yourself by writing down the steps you will take to achieve your goal. If it's to take that exercise class, write down the days and times of the class, the cost, and when you will register.
• Be realistic. Don't try to accomplish too much too soon. If you have resolved to lose weight, set a sensible expectation of pounds per week and give yourself enough time to meet your ultimate goal.
• Plan against mental sabotage. Consider the psychological factors that might get in your way, like when you are frustrated or tired, and how you will overcome them.
• Celebrate each step you take. Tell yourself, "I feel great about not eating fried food this week and losing one pound." Nothing is too small to feel good about. Small steps, highly appreciated, eventually add up to success.

Best wishes to you for the new year, and let me know how your resolutions are coming along.

Home / Online Counseling / Ask Calm Spirit
Fibromyalgia / Hot Flash! / Migraine Headache
Reiki / Qigong / Gua Sha / Feng Shui
Chinese Herbs and Tea
China Travel
Ying Yu Chinese Jade